Dirty Weasley Secret
by voilawriter
Summary: Everyone has secrets,and Weasley's, they have the dirtiest. Enter and learn their deepest secrets, the ones they don't want anyone to know.  Rated T for some mentionings of mature themes.Secrets revealed: From Septimus to Lily.
1. Secrets

Everyone has a secret. Some people only have little white lies, the ones you can sweep under the carpet and no one will think twice about. Others have huge ones, that they try their best to hide before they come bursting out, bigger than ever. But Weasleys? Their secrets are **dirty.**


	2. Septimus Weasley

Septimus Weasley; Husband of One, Father of Four

He is perceived as a nice poor man in the muggle neighborhood he and his wife reside in. He isn't nice, poor yes, but nice not exactly (it's not lying, just pretending). He's not evil either, or manipulative, he just learned his lessons early. He knows this nice act will pay off eventually, than the Weasley name will be the one that is known far and wide, he just has to wait it out. So for now he won't show his true intentions to anyone, he'll just pound his niceness and life lessons into his three boys (in the nicest way possible of course) and keep pretending in front of his wife. It'll play off eventually, he learned that lesson early.


	3. Cedrella Weasley

Cedrella Weasley; Wife of One, Mother of Four

She hates muggles. They are dirty and stupid and just plain repulsive. She hates this filthy muggle town that she lives in and she hates the disgusting threadbare muggle clothes she has to wear out of her home. But she loves Septimus (even though she had no idea how he can care for these _things_) and she loved her boys (though she cringes at Arthur's fascination with the muggles) and she wouldn't lose them. So she'll live among the cattle, and she'll do servants work, but she'll be happy while doing it. Because she is out from under her mother's control and she is married to the love of her life. The company is more important than the location right?


	4. Celaeno Weasley

Celaeno Weasley; Husband of One, Father of Six

God, he was supposed to be the strong one. He was supposed to be the one that pulled through, the one that pulled the rest of them through. The protector. But the sorting hat was right (it had wanted him to put him in _Slytherin_) he was much more like his mother, no courage at all (except for the Liquid Courage he down every night) and when their father passed and his journal was read and they were all left to wonder what kind of person their father really was. He was supposed to protect and pull them through then, but he didn't. Arthur stepped up, and like the kind he was named for, led them to the light. Celaeno feels like a failure as he downs another glass. He had lived forty nine years and had nothing to show for it except six hungry kids and another empty bottle of liquid courage at his feet. He didn't have a drinking problem, just a stress one.


	5. Bilius Weasley

Bilius Weasley; Husband of Three (at different times of course), Father of Seventeen

He never felt good enough, he was sandwiched in between the oldest Weasley brother and _Arthur_. He used to be scared that no one would ever love him as much as his owl did (and that wasn't much. But he's never told anyone that, so let's just keep that between us, shall we? But to put it simply; he was always in the shadow of one of his brothers or the other, never standing in the sun. So he resolved to beat his brothers at something. Problem: he wasn't good at anything. And when it seemed his brothers were racing to see who would have more children (the announcements of their wives pregnancy came again and again) Bilius chose the game. He kept having children until he was much too old to raise any children. He thinks he has seventeen, there might be a few more he is unaware of, but what does he know? He definitely won the competition, they had no idea they were participating in his game, and lastly? All of his children love him a lot more than his grumpy owl ever did.


	6. Arthur Weasley

Arthur Weasley: Husband of Molly, Father of Seven

Arthur has a secret. She happens to be named Morgan. She is the real reason he is so interested in muggle things and how they work. It's so he doesn't sound like an idiot when he get's the chance to talk to her every now and then. So he learns how a telephone works and he reads the muggle newspaper every Sunday so he can talk to her without mentioning 'electisity'. After all, no one likes looking foolish in front of someone. Even if that someone is your squib younger sister who knows nothing about the existence of the wizarding world.


	7. Molly Weasley

Molly Weasley: Wife of Arthur, Mother of Seven

Every Weasley has a secret…

Molly's is that she only loves six of her precious children. You would never know that she doesn't love him; that she never has. She fusses over his hair and supposedly worries over his dangerous job, the one involving huge, deadly, fire breathing beasts. But she only worries about him when he is home because, in reality, she doesn't care. She wished he had died in the battle, not her darling Fred. She had loved Fred, never him. Maybe that is why he still isn't married. He doesn't know what it is like to be loved by a woman because even his own mother doesn't give a damn about him.


	8. Bill Weasley

Bill Weasley: Husband of Fleur, Father of Three

Bill Weasley has always secretly wanted to be someone else. He didn't want to be rich or famous or anything else like that. He just wanted to be one of his brothers. He didn't want to be the oldest, the responsible yet still cool Weasley brother. Bill wanted to be a quidditch star who now works with dangerous dragons like Charlie, or a sure- to- be- future- Minister- of- Magic like Percy. He wanted to be hilarious like Fred or George. He wanted to be loyal and brave like Ron or that person you can't help but love like Ginny. Bill had just wanted to be someone other than Bill. But then he met Fleur. Fleur didn't want any of his siblings, she wanted him. And suddenly being just Bill didn't seem so bad.

**AN" Not really a dirty secret but what ev, I can't imagine Bill as anything too bad. Charlie will be up soon! **


	9. Charlie Weasley

Charlie Weasley: Husband of None, Father of None

Charlie used to be in love with a married woman…and now he is in love with a dead one. It didn't matter that she had never returned his feeling, or that she didn't even know he had them. She was funny, brilliant, beautiful, and always utterly unattainable. But that didn't matter. Charlie would always be in love with Nymphadora Tonks, even if she now was the late Nymphadora Lupin.


	10. Percy Weasley

Percy Weasley: Husband of Audrey, Father of Two.

When Percy introduced Audrey to his family they asked him how they met. He told them they had met at one of the Ministry's cocktail parties and they had hit it off right away. He lied to them of course. They would never find out the dirty secret though. The truth was he had met Audrey right outside The Leaky Cauldron. She didn't want to miss out on any clientele, muggle or magical. Audrey was from a high profile pureblood family, possibly more anti-muggle than the Malfoys, and after the war they lost everything. She would never be able to get a respectable job with a last name like hers. So she got an unrespectable job. She rotated; she was in front of the Leaky Cauldrons on Fridays, Tuesdays, and Sundays. On Mondays she was on some street corner in Southern France, as for the rest she would never tell him. So maybe she was the exact opposite of everything Percy had once believed in, but maybe that was just what he needed, something to balance him out. Fred had always said he would never get a girl without paying her.

**Any ideas for Ron? Anybody? Also, does anybody want me to continue this after the seven kids? DO you want me to go on to the next generation or go backwards to the generations before?**


	11. George Weasley

George Weasley: Husband of Angelina, Father of Two

He has been in love with the same woman all of his life.

Fred was always much more of a ladies man they he was. Fred went from girl to girl; there was always another one waiting in line. But George asked him not to touch one, just one. The one he had been in love with since he was eleven. But Fred went for Roxanne anyway. So after Fred had died in the battle George decided he was going to marry Angelina. He was going to live the life Fred had always wanted, just to spite him. And he did, even though he was still in love with Roxanne Queen. It's not like he was being unfaithful to his wife by loving her, that wouldn't be fair. When he and Angelina had sex, since you couldn't call it making love when neither loved each other, she moaned his dead brother's name. So George did have a dirty secret, one he would name his daughter after.

**An: I'm not sure what to think about this one so tell me what you think. And once again, any ideas for Ron?**


	12. Fred Weasley

Fred Weasley: Husband of None, Father of One, DECEASED

Fred Weasley was the reason Alexia Costello left Hogwarts. He was the reason that her parents homeschooled her for awhile. He was the reason she got fatter and rounder and grumpier for a few months. He was the reason that when she finally came back she seemed unable to gush about boys with her friends, or even connect with them at all really. He was the reason she suddenly cared about her grades and getting a good job after Hogwarts. He was the reason she now carried around a picture of her red headed "baby sister" even though there were no red heads in her family. Fred Weasley was the reason Anna Costello was born.


	13. Ron Weasley

Ron Weasley: Husband of Hermione, Father of Two

So maybe Ron's secret isn't all that bad. He had never cheated on his wife with another woman. He had never killed anyone or anything like that. So really, it wasn't as bad as other people's. But his secret was embarrassing and…dirty. Not a soul would ever know about this secret. He had learned, studied, and practiced Occlumency just so he could hide this secret in the very very back of his mind, behind layers upon layers of protection. Because really there are things you want no one to find out about, and having a gay dream about your best friend just two days before your wedding (where you will be marrying the love of your life, your other best friend) is one of them.


	14. Ginny Weasley now Potter

Ginny Weasley (now Potter): Wife of Harry, Mother of Three

She dreams about him. Every single night he is there, waiting. Every single night, since her first year at Hogwarts. Most of her dreams now center around Harry or the children but he always appears at least once very night. He is waiting there with his pale skin, dark hair that is oh so _soft,_ and long fingers that are oh so _smooth. _He's the first thing she sees when she closes her eyes every night. The first things she feels, those oh so _smooth_ and **cold** hands that make her skin feel like fire. It's from before, before he tore himself, his very soul up into tiny little pieces, and he looks handsome. So even though he isn't the last thought she has in her dreams, he is the first, always. Not that she would admit this dirty little secret to anyone.

**AN: So I added some more clues in to see if you guys would catch on to who it was. If you didn't well…whatever. When I reread the original I realized how hard it would have been to pick up on it. If you didn't catch on after reading this, it was Voldemort. Sixteen year old Tom Riddle.**


	15. Victoire Weasley

Victoire Weasley: Wife of None at the Moment, Mother of None for Now

Teddy and Victoire. We were the first ones born, the first Weasley clan children (though he wasn't technically a Weasley). They only decided to keep their children in the dark about their adventures and fame after they had already shared the stories with us, or at least some of them. I remember sitting on Uncle Harry's lap as I waited for the story to come. Even though Uncle Ron's stories were her favorite (from escaping from the bank he just robbed on a dragon to falling in love with the most beautiful girl at the ball Ron's stories were always the best) Harry's were great too and she couldn't help feel a bit excited. To her vast disappointment though he did not begin to tell a tale of fighting a giant basilisk or something like that, no he had started out with these words; 'I had always hated my birthdays…" He then went on to tell the tale of how his friends made him love his birthdays and how he got to eat cake while his evil cousin Dudley (who is not so evil nowadays) had to diet on chunks of grapefruit. The story was funny but alas, I went to bed rather put out. It wasn't until years later when that story was the story I remembered the most clearly. Because young Uncle Harry and I had something big in common.

We both hated our birthdays. I was born on May 2nd, two years after Uncle Harry defeated Voldemort. I may sound selfish, and I feel like I am, but aren't a little girl's birthday supposed to be her day? I wouldn't know, mine isn't. I give someone else a present on my birthday, doesn't that stink? Why do we even have to give Harry a present, he had a birthday too you know? So yeah, maybe I'm a bit selfish. I have a right to be, I'm a part veela teenage girl, it's my nature. Besides can you really blame me? The rights for May 2nd had been stolen by Uncle Harry, Voldemort, and all the other heroes and villains who fought in the Wizard War. So when do I get my day?

**AN: Even though it's the longest one yet I have to say it's probably the worst. Sorry it took so long and all I gave you was this lame chapter. I updated Ginny so it will be more clear who she is dreaming of, you should go check that out. Please review!**


	16. Molly Weasley II

Molly Weasley: Wife of None, Mother of None

I had always known that my mother was pregnant when my parents got married, you could clearly see her growing stomach when you looked at the wedding pictures. Daddy used to tell me that he was so blinded by Mama's beauty that he got excited and did things a little two fast. When I was little I used to think you put in an order for a baby, like you do for a broom. I had giggled at his statement. When I grew older and understood…where (what) babies come from I couldn't look either of them in the eye for weeks. How long Dad known her before he got "excited and did things a little too fast". Was I a first date baby? Nope.

In second year I caught Teddy snogging Stella Macoon, the school whore. When I yelled at his for even touching that slag, who knows what kind of diseases she had, and breaking Victoire's heart he laughed. And than he turned my skin green, saying it suited my *something that rhymes with witchy* personality. Of course I ran off crying to my dorm, Teddy had been a bit hard on a little first year after all, but not before I made a stop to the library and checked out a book that would help me. I found a spell that would cancel out all the charms, hexes, and jinxes that had been placed upon me. My skin turned back to its usual shade…and my hair turned black.

I had been a metamorphagus all of my life, not that my parent knew, but I could never change my hair color. I could bring it from straight to curly in an instant but no matter how hard I tried it always stayed the same horrid color as my father's hair. In a snap decision I put everything in my appearance back to it's natural setting. I knew that cocoa colored skin. I knew that rebellious black hair. I knew those deep brown eyes. Because they belong to my best friend. It looked as if Renate Zabini was staring back at me, except she had my mother's nose. _My mother was pregnant when my parents married._ I briefly wondered if my father knew and then shook my head, clearing my thoughts, I really didn't want to know. Than I changed back to my usual Weasley-ish appearance. No one would ever know about this.

**An: This one was pretty long as well, I hope you enjoyed. Please review!**


	17. BONUS James Sirius Potter

**BONUS CHAPTER! Yup, that's right this is a bonus chapter. Since James isn't technically a Weasley his secret isn't very dirty, kind of sweet actually. Whatever, point is I am giving you an extra chapter and you should review in appreciation. **

James Potter: Husband of None, Father of None

James Potter had fallen in love with Lily Evans as soon as he laid eyes on her. He then proceeded to make a right mess of things in his attempts to woo her. She was always making a fool of him even though he was too blind to see it. And than when he finally got her to go on a date with him she had him doing everything she wanted. He was totally whipped. And that was not going to happen to James Sirius Potter. So even though he had been blessed (if it was a blessing) with the James Potter curse (falling in love with your soul mate at first sight) he kept quiet about it. He was not going to muck things up like his grandfather had. So instead of covering the entire hall with sunflowers (her favorite flower) he decided just to become friends with her. And if that didn't work he would ignore her for the rest of his Hogwarts years. So maybe James Potter had been in love with the same girl since he was eleven, but he wasn't about to say anything. No one had to know about the James Potter curse…that is until he blessed his own son with it.


	18. Roxanne Weasley

Roxanne Weasley: Wife of None, Mother of None (She is only fifteen after all)

Roxanne Weasley was not the best witch in Hogwarts- not by a long shot. Her cousin Rose was practically two years ahead of her in school, and Rose was a year younger. She supposed that she took after her dad in that way, he was never the best at school. And like her dad she did know a lot of spells, just not ones that teachers liked to teach you. So when James and Fred, her annoying cousin and brother, sneaked off to wreak havoc while the Weasley/Potter clan was making their annual visit to St. Mungo's (to thank all the brave people who fought that day), she had followed.

Unfortunately she had gotten lost. Not to be deterred she made her way into a room that they had come across on the way through the halls, when the group was coming back she's just slip into their numbers and no one would notice her absence. The room was occupied by three people. Frank and Alice Longbottom, and the man who taught her (as she thought of it then) the most useless spell ever. Sure it sounded useful but it also sounded like something she could be arrested for using. That day Gilderoy Lockhart taught her Obliviate.

Two years have passed since that day and the spell has been pushed into the back of her mind, but not forgotten. You never forget that spell once you've learned it, it is a lot like riding a bicycle in that way. So when she's on her way to drop off her ideas, she contributes some every few weeks, at her dad's shop in Diagon Alley she does not expect to be using it. Why would she have to? But alas she also does not expect what she finds there.

The shop is closed for the worker's early lunch break as usual and she opens the door with the golden key around her neck (she has a habit of losing things). She makes her way towards the invention room where she usually drops off her ideas when she hears her name. _Roxanne_. It was coming from her dad's office so she switches paths and makes her way towards the door. _Roxanne._ Without even bothering to reply to his calls or knock she pushes open the door. And there, right on the desk, is Roxanne Queen (the famous designer), being fucked by George Weasley, Roxanne's (Roxanne Weasley's that is) father. Roxanne (Weasley) didn't say a word, she waited at the door till they were finished. While they panted she took a cold stance.

"Hello father, pleasure to see you as always." Both of the adults' heads whipped towards her and her father had the decency to look ashamed. Roxanne quickly slid off the desk and began to dress as quickly as possible while her father zipped up his pants.

"Rox-."

"Be quiet father. Say goodbye to her and than we'll talk." Her father gave the women a kiss, right in front of his daughter, and Roxanne couldn't help but gag a bit. Just as they had finished their farewell Roxanne composed herself once more.

"Now that was touching. It's good that you made use of your last goodbye. _Obliviate!"_ That day George Weasley forgot about having an affair, or even wanting to have an affair, with Roxanne Queen. That day Roxanne Queen forgot about her trysts with George Weasley and her love for him. That night Roxanne Weasley burned every piece of Queen Couture that she owned. And maybe a love potion was slipped into her parents' drinks that night, but who really knows that for sure?

**AN: Long and maybe a bit confusing, I didn't turn out as well as I'd hoped. But what did you think? Sorry for the long wait! Please review. **


	19. Fred Weasley II

Fred Weasley II; Husband of None (and not sure if he will ever be), Father of None

It was wrong, everything about it was absolutely wrong. Fred Weasley is disgusted with himself and he doesn't speak a word of why he is, because if he did everyone would be just as disgusted with him as he already is. His veela cousins walk by and he doesn't bat an eye, their magic does nothing. No one captures his attention but _her._ And that's why it's so wrong, she shouldn't. He wants to go blind so he won't see them together but in other ways he is thanking Merlin that Scorpius Malfoy has claimed her for his own (and not letting anyone else near her). Because if he hadn't Fred wasn't sure he would be able to resist. For some twisted reason Rose Weasley (his _cousin_) was the girl he couldn't take his eyes off of. It is oh so _wrong_ but she's the only girl he sees.

**AN: So I'm back to my little paragraphs. Hope you enjoyed this chapter, a bonus chapter will be up soon (Albus) so review!**


	20. BONUS Albus Severus Potter

**Bonus Chapter, yup here is another secret from the Potter branch of the Weasley tree. Hope you enjoy!**

Albus Severus Potter: Husband of None, Father of None

When his father was a baby Voldemort tried to kill him. Because Albus' grandmother had used some ancient magic and died for his father, his father was protected and lived. But in the explosion a piece of Voldemort's unstable soul latched onto Harry Potter's own soul, granting him abilities such as parseltongue. When Albus' father was seventeen Voldemort killed that piece of his own soul, therefore Harry Potter could no longer speak to snakes. _So why could Albus?_ Now that was the question. Neither Albus nor Rose, the only person he had told this secret to, knew. That was how it was going to stay, he wasn't about to go tell some expert about it and have him go blabbing to the papers. HARRY POTTER'S SLYTHERIN SON SECRET DARK WIZARD. Albus was not about to let that happen, so when James asked him how he managed to get into the Chamber of Secrets and throw that wild party he let Rose take all of the credit, she is rather gifted with advanced spells after all.

**AN: So how did you like it? Please review!**


	21. Rose Weasley

Rose Weasley: Wife of None, Mother of None

Dear Whomever is Reading This,

People always ask why I read so much, well at least those who don't just assume that it's because I am Hermione Granger's daughter. I have so many answers to the question because none of the are the real truth. Because I could never tell them the real reason, I can never tell anyone.

I live through reading. Books, magazines, myths, short stories, newspapers, blogs, even songs. Anything with a story or emotion within it I'll take. Books can't hurt me, they can't leave me. They can make me cry, or make me laugh, they can even change the way I look at the world. I live through reading because I don't really have a real life to live. Reading about someone's adventures is exciting because I know I'll never have my own. Reading about some girl's romance makes me happy because it's the only romance I'll get. I know in the end I am going to be married to some drunk who doesn't love me while I take care of our 2.5 kids. So that's why I read. Yes, I enjoy it and I learn from it, but this is the whole truth. So you were right all along Scorpius Malfoy, I don't have a life and the only my only friends are the characters I meet in books. You're right, you are smarter than me, smarter than everyone, because you are the only person who figured me out.

**AN: Since I am a RosexScorpius supporter I had to have Scorpius in this chapter, though he isn't in a very good role is he? Hope you enjoyed and please review!**


	22. Dominique Weasley

_Dominique Weasley: Wife of None, Mother of None_

_ "Just be yourself, everything will be fine. You'll have tons of friends in no time, just look at your sister." With that her father gave her a pat on the shoulder and turned to say his farewells to her sister. His words rang in my ears still, years later._

_Just be yourself__. Yeah, that worked. After a few months of being ignored by anyone who wasn't family (read: people who are required to like me) I discarded this horrible piece of advice. Locked away was abrasive, annoying, vocabulary obsessed Dominique. After I locked her away and turned on the veela charm it didn't take long for me to prove how horrible my father's advice had been. _

_Everything will be fine.__ Everything was fine. __Fine. Fine. Fine. __Everything was fine. Just ask her beautiful wand of elm, it had been performing healing spells for months. After all, she couldn't have any scars, one of her __distractions__ might find them while their hands roamed her body. But nothing left a mark (on the outside) so everything would be __fine__. _

_You'll have tons of friends in no time.__ Dominique had friends; at least that's what they called themselves. They were admirers and enemies. At the slightest hint on weakness they would gladly push her off the throne and take a seat in her spot, laughing as she tumbled to her death. She doesn't have to wonder what they would do if they found out just how __fine__ she really is. She already knows what they would do. But aren't all friendships like this? True friendship is just a myth, made up by some crackpot old fool._

_Just look at your sister.__ Dominique is looking, she's staring, she's hoping. Could some of Victoire's perfectness rub off onto her? But no, that would never be. The two girls may have been sisters but they were anything but similar. To the outside maybe, they were practically twins to everyone but themselves. Because Victoire is fine, no she's __**perfect**__, and Dominique is __fine._


	23. Louis Weasley

**Note: If you are looking for the new chapters, go to chapter 2 (Septimus Weasley) through 5 (Bilius Weasley). **

Louis Weasley: Husband of None, Father of None

Louis Weasley locks eyes with his girlfriend of two years from across the room. She is talking to some of his cousins, probably gossiping about Rose, and she gives him a small smile before turning back and fully immersing herself in the conversation once more. He wonders if he should feel bad that he's lying to her, that he stays with her even though he doesn't want to. It was her fault really. Louis had always been such a do-gooder, never hurt a fly. He was even a vegetarian for Merlin's sake. When she had told him that if he broke up with her she would kill himself he hadn't took her seriously…at first. But Mai, that's the girlfriend, was **dead** serious. So he tells her he loves her, even though he doesn't, and he tells his family how he dreams of marrying her, because no one can ever know why he actually stays with her. But when Louis' eyes lock with Mai's once more he feels the smallest spark of hope, maybe he can learn to love her. And then it's gone.


	24. Lucy Weasley

**Note: If you are looking for the new chapters, go to chapter 2 (Septimus Weasley) through 5 (Bilius Weasley). **

Lucy Weasley; Wife of None, Mother of None (so far at least)

I hate prissy rule followers. They are just plain annoying. They're always getting my cousin in trouble, sucking up to teachers, and acting like they're better than everyone else. They act like only what they have to say is important. And even though they're always getting my family in trouble, they still have the nerve to try and suck up to **us.** People are always trying to suck up to us, for the media and fame, for the popularity, or even for the money. But the worst are the ambitious ones, who want your family, well really their high standings in the world, to help them get somewhere. They just use you. They're horrible people. Condescending, stuck up, pompous, rude. Nobody likes them. But the real reason I don't like them? Because they remind me of myself. And sense my family hates all of them, how do I not know that they don't hate me as well?

**AN: So did you like it? Please review! Hugo's will be up really soon. Does anyone have an idea for Lily, I am really at a loss for her.**


	25. Hugo Weasley

**Note: If you are looking for the new chapters, go to chapter 2 (Septimus Weasley) through 5 (Bilius Weasley). **

Hugo Weasley: Husband of None, Father of None (but he may be eventually)

It was actually much easier than Hugo had thought it would be. Like Voldemort, Wizards and Witches often over look things that they believe to be below them. All Hugo had to do was ace all of his homework but bomb his tests and class work; that gets their attention. They called him into a team meeting, with his famous parents, and they asked him what the problem is, they think he's cheating on his homework. And all he tells them is that he listens to music while doing his homework, that it focuses him better. For awhile they place him in another room where there is a radio playing when he takes tests. But that gets too annoying and out of the norm so they search for another solution. And Rose, being the brilliant, kind, talented, _perfect_, sister she is whips up a solution. An iPod. For a moment he thinks that she is just as ignorant as they are, but than she teaches him how to sync recordings onto it, and he knows, she knows what he's up to. So his brilliant, kind, talented, perfect, sister helps out the overlooked brother. So when he went into his OWLs plugged into his shiny green iPod, his famous important influential mother had gotten him special permission to use it, there was Hugo's voice, and every so often Rose's, reading aloud how to transfigure a thumb tack into a dolphin, or charm a spider to dance. Because he is definitely going to need to know how to do that later in his life. So yeah he was too dumb to learn what was on the OWLs, but at least he was smart enough to figure out a way to cheat on them.

**AN: So Hugo Weasley cheated on his OWLS, whoopee. A student of my mother's (she teaches High School Global History in New York City) actually did this (not for a big test like the SATs though, just a normal test) I thought it was pretty smart since he didn't get caught. What did you think? Review please!**


	26. BONUS Lily Luna Potter

**Note: If you are looking for the new chapters, go to chapter 2 (Septimus Weasley) through 5 (Bilius Weasley). **

Lily Luna Potter: Wife of None, Mother of None

When Lily was young she heard stories about her mother, the great Ginny Weasley. She was a famous quidditch star and she was the wife of the Boy(Man)-Who-Lived. But while she was often told stories about her dangerous adventures with her friends, Lily felt she was never told a story that told her who her mother truly was, or at least who she had been. So one day at the tender age of seven she set out to find someone who wouldn't coat over any truths of leave out unpleasent details. It was lucky that Luna Scamander grew up with Ginny, she was perfect for what Lily needed. So even though Luna was sidetracked a bit too often by nargles and wrackspurts for Lily's liking, Lily was eventually able to get the whole tale of her mother's time at Hogwarts out of her. And what an _adventurous_ time it was. Lily knew for a fact her father had only kissed 3 people in his life; Cho Chang, her mother, and Luna herself underneath the mistletoe last year. But Ginny? A lot more than three. And from the way Luna had spoken there had been more than kissing going on.

It was that day that Lily vowed to not be like her mother. At seven years old losing _it_ in a dusty brook cupboard doesn't seem very romantic (not that it really does at any age) and as she got older Lily was much too stubborn too break a promise she made to _herself_. So she had made a pact with her boyfriend that they wouldn't _make love _(not have sex) until they were both in love with each other. And he had told her he loved her tonight. And they had done _it_ in the Room of Requirement (not a broom cupboard) and she still wasn't sure what _it_ was. Because try as she might, she had just broken the pact. She wasn't in love with Richie.

And this fact had absolutely nothing to do with the blonde (reformed) playboy that her cousin Rose was dating. Nothing. At. All.


	27. Thank You

Read the Companion Piece:

_-A Filthy Malfoy Secret-_

The Stories of Malfoys through the ages

(and the filthy secrets they never wanted you to find out)


	28. A Filthy Malfoy Secret

***COMING SOON TO A COMPUTER NEAR YOU***

_*-A Filthy Malfoy Secret-*_

The Stories of Malfoys through the ages

(and the filthy secrets they never wanted you to find out)

^^Add Voilawriter to your StoryAlert today to be the first to read this new installment, or simply check out Voilawriter's profile multiple times in the next few days until it pops up. Your choice^^


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